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May 23 2018

fuglyselfie:

me: logs into my google account

google all up in my email: BITCH??? THE FCUK IS YOU HACKED???

sweetscasket:

paper-mario-wiki:

im calling out everyone who says “this cleared my skin and watered my crops” when responding to images they like

i know you dont have crops

and i know you dont have skin

stop lying for a “joke”, this is a serious website for people to make posts on their blogs about their life experiences, not about making a ruckus and acting like fools

im so sorry

dscgshauntingground:

I’ll tell you who opens the jars in a lesbian relationship. we both do and we have to keep handing the jar back and forth for one to have a go while the other encourages her in a loving and supportive way.

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airyravenmaid:

Tag away, my dudes

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jdmsrovia:

FUCK AHAHAHHA

Dear Anyone Who Hates Cats

procrastinatingbookworm:

cliteralviolence:

coolcatgroup:

coolcatgroup:

broadwayfangirlblr:

My cat literally sleeps next to my face until she thinks I’m asleep and then she’ll move to the end of my bed. If I wake up at night she’ll go back up to me head and stay with me until I fall asleep again. In the morning she’ll follow me when I call her. She’s a precious lil nugget.

My best friend!!!!

I LOVE HER.

i would die for that cat

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ayellowbirds:

therobotmonster:

renegadex557:

heteromanticmarkiplier:

chaosbong:

deanest:

reggieandme:

summer mood

#what is shaggy wearing (x)

holy shit shaggy is secretly jacked

Closeted chad.

Jacked? Damn straight, have you seen him with those weight lifting scenes?! He lifts it up like it’s a feather!

Dude spends every week running for his life with a dog that’s got to be at least 100 lbs in his arms. Constant aerobic workout with weights, massive hunger, laid back attitude: he’s an fighting-anime hero whose style is entirely built around escape and speed. 

According to season 1 episodes of Scooby-Doo, Where Are You, Shaggy is both “the swingingest gymnast in school”, and a track & field athlete who is the fastest (human) in the gang. So, yes. Definitively canon. 

His appetite isn’t about being stoned, it’s because he’s a teenage jock.

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the-real-slim-strider:

weirdmageddon:

the-real-slim-strider:

weirdmageddon:

protip if you ever eat too much sour/acidic shit and you burn layers off your tongue suck on a tums tablet cause theyre used as stomach antacids but i didnt consider that it would act immediately on acidic surfaces but it does and it provides temporary tongue comfort

this would have been useful information when i murdered my mouth eating ten warheads in a row

hey quick question what was going through your mind when doing that

“urghurhur im love eat sour”

it was a bad call

May 22 2018

fernbrake:

fernbrake:

anyways I saw a billboard yesterday for some car product that said “don’t bust your knuckles, bust your nuts” and I almost combusted 

image

garashirs:

tumblr post: reblog if you’re not homophobic!!!!1!

me, a gay who is tired of seeing this shit on my dash:

brassy:

brassy:

brassy:

brassy:

how do you make someone holy

you beat the hell out of them

my 96 year old catholic grandma told me this

did you just trigger tag my grandma

May 21 2018

demonladytakkuri:

cousinnick:

trisshawkeye:

shattered-earth:

maxeth:

steel-kun:

dream-cassette:

steel-kun:

Name a conspiracy theory superior in raw power to “there are no actual forests on Earth"

imma need some context on that cause WHAT?

“forests” = minuscule form of what trees on Earth can be, basically saplings
“mesas” = not landforms, but petrified ancient tree trunks
IIRC the theory goes that all forests on Earth were destroyed ages ago and it takes them ridiculous times to regrow, with those giant mammoth redwood trees just being the oldest ones that have grown the most

evidence 1:

This conspiracy theory is absolutely wild and includes the assertion that all rocks are left over remnants of plants/trees from a “silicon era”. Although it’s obviously.. not true.. they really have some amazing photos that feed your imagination of a fantasy world, i’ve compiled their best:

imageimage

do you think giant trees would have proportionally giant branhes or would they just be like furry green spears? LOL

I love how the implication is that the flat tops of mesas were caused by something equally enormous CUTTING THEM DOWN

Paul Bunyan cryptid confirmed 

I want to believe

cobaltdays:

unabashedlybi:

cobbor:

two bottoms chilling in a hot tub, five feet apart cause they’re both bottoms

Is it because the jets are 5 feet apart?

you know what

pizzaback:

1972-012a:

i watched the episode where lisas president and bart asks her to legalize it and shes like What and he just looks at her like this

gay marriage

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because-im-freaking-greed:

foxnewsfuckfest:

sixyearsofcollegedownthedrain:

airspaniel:

drunkwario:

Anon hate from the late 1800’s.

What I love most about this is that this person was SO INCENSED at the recipient that they couldn’t even wait the days/weeks it would take for the mail to go through. No, they had to say “FUCK YOU” as soon as fucking possible and, AND, let the recipient that they were not done with the fuck you, nay, this was merely the first volley in what would undoubtably be a dressing down of Biblical proportions.

i will gleefully reblog this every time i see it

My #brand

Telegrams were pricey too. They paid a lot to say fuck you as soon as possible

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dragon-in-a-fez:

marisatomay:

nerdjpg:

Hi I made this. Discuss. Left column is the first word.

me: “this chart doesn’t even make sense, it’s just the same words on both axes, what the fuck is a goth goth”

me, after looking at it for ten seconds: “this is the most accurate thing I’ve ever seen”

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